Stream of consciousness (9)

Blog98:

5:14 … It is miserable outdoors!  Winds at 75mph could chill to the bones.  Cinn and Dink, mostly Cinn- the instigator’, are already at their morning raucous.  With Mick away, I have duty to feed them, play with them, walk them outside … the part I know I will not enjoy!  Then it’s morning routine – shower, dress and go!  Breakfast can wait ‘til 10AM if I get lucky …

10:50 … “Breathe, my lungs!” … It’s uptight all around today;  many drop-ins and well-wishers.  Breaking in and updating new personnel who’ll carry on the torch: data files to share, transitioning suggestions, getting around the building, getting to know Staff … ramblings here and there; I guess it’s just part of the deal.  “Did you get that?  What other questions should I clarify/answer for you?”

1:02 … I didn’t remember to take pictures of some students served in my program.  That’s sad.  Anyway, they’re so very young, and I perhaps did not yet make memorable impressions on them.  That’s easier to deal with.  Remember … no attachments!  It’s easier to go away when attachments are not strong! 

     …Thinking through now – whom shall I miss?  Hmnnn … no one!  Except for fond memories of camaraderie maybe, there’s not much to miss. There’s little time for any personnel in a big organization to bond with or little groups to get together.  I’ll perhaps miss the wonderful kids that lighted up my life every so often, but soon, their faces will be a blur, and that’s just as well.  There’ll be plenty of time to make new acquaintances.

3:10 … Duties … responsibilities … structured routines …deadlines … schedules… all are pressures that come with civil service.  Which do I really detest?  Structured routines!  They’re a force to be reckoned with.  You can’t live nonchalantly with them.  

6:18 … Off to a dinner date I go, but not after a home visit to a single family head and her six children.  A knock at the door … greetings, and I witness abject poverty all around the apartment.  How can that apartment cost $500.00 rent?  It was pitiful!  Anyway, Mick and I, along with St John’s UMC should be happy to know that the work we are doing showers tremendous gifts and blessings.  Soon, the 6 children and Mom will have beds on which to sleep soundly and safely!

8:16 … Feeling nauseated and dizzy a bit.  I don’t like this feeling.  I don’t especially like the fact that this cold bug had lingered the last two weeks in my body and this rough cough still keeps on irritating me!